It’s great to hear your ruminations on community and the post-Twitter internet landscape, you are so smart about this, and I really appreciate your thoughts. And yes, your vulnerability! So many of us are trying to navigate this landscape as well (and grinding our teeth over what the future may hold). Please keep thinking out loud!
It reads like you’re doing these things effectively already, but here’s a couple tools from therapy that I use the most, that may help you or anyone else reading (or not! We’re all unique individuals living life in ways specific to ourselves!):
1. Sometimes a situation is simply no longer the right fit and it’s okay to move on from it. We each know when it’s not the right fit anymore and when it’s time to find something else. It’s not so much a statement about ourselves, but an acknowledgment of the situation’s fit. Leaving Twitter, career changes, personal relationships, and so on, this mindset has helped me immeasurably of late.
2. We’re capable of holding multiple and often competing truths without one negating and invalidating another. For instance, I understand what someone went through that led them to hurt me, and that’s true, but the way it makes me feel is also true. This is probably the therapy tool I use the most often.
So, yeah, dropping in to validate what you’re feeling and that it looks like you’re doing the right things in regard to those feelings.
This speaks to a lot of what I've been feeling about the way social media and online interaction has changed. I think, on a positive note, that people are more willing to reach out when someone talks about their emotions. We've moved on from the 90s/00s snark and folks are becoming more mental health conscious. I also feel like caregiving is a difficult topic. I've found that people are surprised or uncomfortable if I share how difficult it is, like it's almost taboo. Your messages have made me feel seen, and I hope you have support and people who you can talk to about it - it can be so isolating.
I often find myself thinking back to the Carol Corps days on tumblr/twitter and I miss the sense of community and belonging. (Carol Corps high school reunion when?) You said that online presence these days is fragmented, and that's how it feels in fandom, too. The lack of a solid hitching post has made it hard to build fan communities that aren't vulnerable to algorithmic woes. A lot of folks use discord, but it requires moderating/human labor.
I don't want my comment to get too long, but I have appreciated reading your messages and posts over the years - BGSD, posts about the industry, answering fan questions on tumblr, BP pinterest boards, newsletters, and so on. (As a reader, I hate that you have to market your own books, fwiw, but I'm glad it resulted in the Carol Corps.) I still write some of your motivational sayings from tumblr in my planner! 🙈 If you want to keep BGSD going or regenerate it, I'm here for it.
Wishing you and yours all the best. Always thrilled by the prospect of reading more KSD and partners.
Discord seems to be the closest I've got to that feeling on Twitter - but it's still very insular.
It helps keep the...less than productive arguments out of my view, but it also keeps a lot of the surprise and wonder of pre-Elon Twitter had.
There's clearly a desire to go back to those days, so it might just be a matter of time.
I'm gonna have that Fiona Apple song in my head ALL DAY now (Not bad about it)
It’s great to hear your ruminations on community and the post-Twitter internet landscape, you are so smart about this, and I really appreciate your thoughts. And yes, your vulnerability! So many of us are trying to navigate this landscape as well (and grinding our teeth over what the future may hold). Please keep thinking out loud!
Also i am absolutely not hot without hair. 😂
I mean, are you SURE? HAVE YOU REALLY TRIED, Janet??
Dude. I would go for Sinead, but end up Zippy the Pinhead. 😅
Your vulnerability is always so appreciated!
It reads like you’re doing these things effectively already, but here’s a couple tools from therapy that I use the most, that may help you or anyone else reading (or not! We’re all unique individuals living life in ways specific to ourselves!):
1. Sometimes a situation is simply no longer the right fit and it’s okay to move on from it. We each know when it’s not the right fit anymore and when it’s time to find something else. It’s not so much a statement about ourselves, but an acknowledgment of the situation’s fit. Leaving Twitter, career changes, personal relationships, and so on, this mindset has helped me immeasurably of late.
2. We’re capable of holding multiple and often competing truths without one negating and invalidating another. For instance, I understand what someone went through that led them to hurt me, and that’s true, but the way it makes me feel is also true. This is probably the therapy tool I use the most often.
So, yeah, dropping in to validate what you’re feeling and that it looks like you’re doing the right things in regard to those feelings.
This was an informative read!
This speaks to a lot of what I've been feeling about the way social media and online interaction has changed. I think, on a positive note, that people are more willing to reach out when someone talks about their emotions. We've moved on from the 90s/00s snark and folks are becoming more mental health conscious. I also feel like caregiving is a difficult topic. I've found that people are surprised or uncomfortable if I share how difficult it is, like it's almost taboo. Your messages have made me feel seen, and I hope you have support and people who you can talk to about it - it can be so isolating.
I often find myself thinking back to the Carol Corps days on tumblr/twitter and I miss the sense of community and belonging. (Carol Corps high school reunion when?) You said that online presence these days is fragmented, and that's how it feels in fandom, too. The lack of a solid hitching post has made it hard to build fan communities that aren't vulnerable to algorithmic woes. A lot of folks use discord, but it requires moderating/human labor.
I don't want my comment to get too long, but I have appreciated reading your messages and posts over the years - BGSD, posts about the industry, answering fan questions on tumblr, BP pinterest boards, newsletters, and so on. (As a reader, I hate that you have to market your own books, fwiw, but I'm glad it resulted in the Carol Corps.) I still write some of your motivational sayings from tumblr in my planner! 🙈 If you want to keep BGSD going or regenerate it, I'm here for it.
Sarah, I appreciate you so much. Are you doing Dragon Con this year?
Unfortunately not!
Raspberry noise.